The Perfect Storm

Occasionally several forces come together to create a deal that only comes along once in a while. In this case, I managed to use a coupon, a sale, and a free gift card to create the mother of all deals... the perfect storm.

Those of you without kids don't know the bane of existence known as diaper shopping. They're expensive and the bigger your child gets, the less diapers come in a package, as if they were a drug that you've built up a tolerance against that requires more and more to get the same fix. A cruel injustice to parents everywhere. Thankfully, Target offered a sale where if you bought 3 jumbo packs of diapers for $8.99 you'd receive a $5 gift card. That's not a great deal, after all a "jumbo" pack of diapers only has about 50 diapers, which lasts about 10 days if you're lucky. But I went shopping with my mom who had a 10 percent off Target coupon. So 3 diapers for $27, minus $2.70 is $24.30 plus the $5 gift card. AND I had 3 coupons for $3 off each diaper pack, so my final price was $15.30 and a $5 gift card. Three retail forces converged upon each other made this the perfect storm.

However, Target being my kryptonite, I was completely unable to escape without buying more. I also found a cell phone charge station on clearance for $14, a Dr. Seuss book on sale for $3, the Muppets Take Manhattan on DVD for $5, and this shiny new mirror for $15. Oh Target Clearance, I am powerless against your wily ways!

Someone Stole My FlipFlops

I can not even begin to express the anger, hurt and total injustice that I feel when something I want is sold out. It produces a very unhappy Paige, a Paige people don't like to be around, an obsessive, mopey, grudging Paige known to many as Paige Rage. Ruelala, today you have incurred the Paige Rage!

Ruelala is one of those designer markdown sites and today I got an instant message from my loving husband letting me know that Havaianas were on sale there. What a wonderful man I have that despite having just recently blown a huge wad of cash on completely unnecessary pillows, he lets me know that my favorite things in the world are on sale, flip flops (though it was a bit silly of him not to realize that I already knew about it of course). I have a bit of an impulse control problem when it comes to flip flops. I find it impossible to refuse them when they look at me with those pretty little soles. After all, one can NEVER have too many pairs of flip flops. They take up hardly any room in the closet and they are so cheap! A few years ago, my husband pointed out that I had a dozen pairs of flip flops... I actually had more when I counted, and of course I've added more since then, but I digress...

Havaianas. Oprah loves them so you know they must be good right? They're amazing, the best flip flops ever made, and I say that without hyperbole. I even forced my husband to get a pair and he HATES flip flops, but what did he wear every day of our vacation? I have 2 pairs of them, not NEARLY enough. So a Havaianas sale is a perfect way to add to my collection. I browsed the sale and the price was definitely right, a 2 pack for $20. These are normally around $16-$22 a pair, so $20 for 2 pair is great. I found a set I loved with turquoise and white soles and shiny gold thongs and put it in my cart.

Ruelala is a site I've only recently joined, so I wasn't completely familiar with it. I updated my shipping and billing address since I've just moved to a new house. Then I took a look at the other sales going on. When I was sure I wasn't going to buy anything else (only about 5 minutes of browsing), I went to check out. What do I see? A message that says "This item has completely sold out and has been removed from your bag."  EXCUSE ME????  SOMEONE STOLE MY FLIP FLOPS! No ticker letting me know I only had a certain amount of time before the item would expire. No alert letting me know the item was about to be removed. NOTHING. How incredibly rude! Imagine you're at a store and you grab a pair of shoes and put it in your shopping cart. You turn away for a second to look at some delightful sunglasses and when you look back at your cart someone has taken your shoes! Bad shopping etiquette-- it's just NOT DONE!

I hope you're happy, random person with my size 10 season & spring Havaianas set. I hope they give you blisters!

Shiny Happy Pillows

I hate to begin my shoploits with such a splurge, but let the accessories fall where they may. As I mentioned, I have a new house to fill. When we moved out of our modest 2 bedroom townhouse into a 3 bedroom colonial, my husband and I suddenly found our living room sectional unbearable. It was a hand-me-down in good condition when we received it, but a certain misbehaving feline decided to mark his territory upon it and to shred the arms beyond recognition. Its potent odor became all the more apparent when we picked it up to move it. Not wanting to taint our new living room with its scent and having had our boy neutered (much to his chagrin), it was time to purchase some grown-up furniture.

To give you a little background on the purchase, Black Friday is my absolute favorite day of the year. I plan for weeks what I'm going to buy, how long I'm going to spend in each store, and usually end up purchasing more for myself than any presents for friends or family. After scouring the stores for hours, my mom and I ended up at JCPenney around 11 am (we began at 4:30). We were running out of steam and landed on an extremely comfortable doorbuster furniture set. Microfiber sofa, loveseat and chair for $688, an unbelievable deal. I was sold. I called my super-supportive husband to let him know we were the proud owners of new furniture. I would say that I called to ask him what he thought, but we all know that I was going to buy that shiny new furniture no matter what he said, bless his heart. One thing he has learned over the course of our 8 year relationship is to trust my buying judgment or else suffer my endless buyer's regret.

Last week our mocha furniture was delivered and as I drank in the way it looked in our newly-painted living room with the gold walls and brown carpet, I thought to myself "What this needs is some perfectly accented throw pillows." I wasn't satisfied with the $7.99 2-pack we had bought at Target. These were solid colors and the sofas really needed something with personality. Unfortunately for me, personality found its way into my inbox.

Somewhere along the line, a friend of mine sent me an invitation to a site called Gilt Groupe. It's a site where you receive daily emails of designer sales that go off at noon. If you're lucky enough to have a desk job, you can sometimes snatch up fantastic deals before all the good stuff gets sold out. In the last few months, these sites have been multiplying like the national debt. I'm now a member of ideeli, hautelook, ruelala, billiondollarbabes, and the fairest (though there are probably more).

This week's Gilt Groupe sale was for designer Thomas Paul's silkscreened throw pillows. I clicked and lo and behold they were gorgeous. Beautiful colors of plums and turquoise and peach, and patterns of damask and corals and florals. Just the touch of personality I was looking for. It was the stylish accent my living room NEEDED and at $40 a pillow, it was a bargain!

Wait, $40 a pillow? Isn't that a little high? Yes, but they retail for up to $100 a pillow, so it's a great deal. And look, one of the ones I loved is listed as "In Members' Carts." I HAVE to have that one! Let me keep clicking on it. SCORE, it's out of their carts and into mine. But do I really NEED $40 pillows? Yes, and I only have 5 minutes left of time in my cart before they go back on the site! HURRY, BUY THEM.

And that's how I spent $154 on 4 pillows. Stunning pillows that will totally tie the room together. Pillows that have such style that they make me more stylish. Pillows that my baby will assuredly spit up on. Pillows. Like a bad one-night stand I feel ashamed for giving in to the rush, the thrill of it all and look upon the bill in the cold light of day.

Flourish Pillow $40
Herbarium Pillow $44
Sarah Pillow $38
Bali Pillow $22
Shipping $10

Total: $154

Sigh, I'm going to have to do some penance for this one. 10 Hail Macy's should do the trick!

The Shopper's Creed

It's an addiction, a sport, a pasttime, a thrill, a necessity, a skill, a pride, a shame, a lifestyle. Shopping. Quite possibly my greatest triumphs and my most crushing defeats have happened not in the workplace or at school, but at the stores! I am a shopper and I challenge anyone to get a better deal than me. I don't have a lot of money; I'm just a working middle-class married new mother with a new house to fill, but I am a talented pro when it comes to buying. Because no matter what they tell you, if you think this or that thing will never go on sale, it always does.

Here you will find a recording of my exploits in the marketplace. Sometimes they are fantastic, like the $1400 I saved on my new refrigerator. Sometimes regrettable, like the one that follows. Unfortunately, I don't have that thing that other people have-- that little voice in your head that says "I don't need that." If it's something I want, then I MUST have it. Why? Because it was shiny.